14 months later

by Alexandra Potcoava (Romania)

I didn't expect to find Romania

Last February, I timidly got on a plane to Manila, anxious as hell, scared that I had no idea what I was doing and generally afraid that I might have made a mistake quitting my job and giving up my old life; a life I had been building for the better part of a decade. But I knew it was something I had to do for myself; to get over the depression and burnout that I had been dealing with for the last two years. I had a mission, I needed to find myself and learn how to be happy again. For the last 14 months I travelled in 22 countries, I've taken numerous flights, busses, vans, taxis, ubers, boats, trains and trams. I've gone below sea level and climbed as high as 5200m. I've mostly spent my time in hot weather, but I also enjoyed the occasional snowball fight, sleeping in -10 degrees and snorkelling in freezing water. I've seen animals and sights most people only get to see in documentaries; I've eaten too much rice for my taste, and I've also tried many different fruits. But above all, I met a lot of people. People who I haven't spoken to after we parted ways, people that shook me to the core and whose friendship I will forever treasure, regardless of the distance, and also people who made an everlasting impression and restored my faith in humanity. Earlier today, before boarding my flight, a friend asked me if I had found myself. Truth be told: I haven't! I found a whole new person who has been heartbroken, who is shy and technologically challenged at times, gets annoyed quicker than she would like, who is bad at keeping in contact and at telling people she cares about how she feels. But I also found, a person who is good, pure and caring, who is far stronger than most, including herself, believed. Somebody who learnt to be honest and open, to speak up when she doesn't agree with something, but also accept different opinions. Somebody who let go of structure in order to fully and wholeheartedly experience freedom, people and the world. I discovered a new me that is a much better version of who I thought I was. I am confident, strong and ready to challenge the world but also to keep discovering it and myself at the same time.