''A girl is a no girl''

by Muhammad afaq khan wazir (Pakistan)

A leap into the unknown Pakistan

Shares

Born and raised in the Valleys of Himalayas with diverse cultures, life - to her has been about exploring, knowing, creating harmony and adding value to her own existence. Celebrating her culture, hiking, and scouting and volunteerism had been her passion and pass time since she was six years. She always looks for the highest spot to sit and observe things during the hike. Always the one who find the best and top spot. Reaching first, Sitting at the top, she writes- about her existence, questions her existence, she writes about life and the life after death. Write about her suffering, her pain. Though she is asthmatic, she climbs mountains after mountains. Being asthmatic and climbing mountains when she couldn't breathe and the chest is burning, Tears rolling down her face, Intense. Everyone cheers for her. People think that she is the happiest and luckiest person alive on earth, some calls her a fierce tigress but she only shows what she wanted you to see, no one knows who she really is. She has many friends yet no one understands her, sitting around her loved ones yet she feels lonely, the feeling of emptiness, something is missing, something is always missing no matter. Is the world was able to hear what she holds inside her heart, it would be an explosion, People won’t be able to bear it Just like a volcano. She has been alone all her life, She has been hurt so bad, she want to forgets everything now She used to glow whenever you were around, you did not break sprit it was her dreams that you took. Her eyes are like an ocean, deep, quiet and Honest. You can get drown but just to find out its depth you would risk your life and jump, No matter what she says, no matter how much she lies, her eyes says it all, once and for all. It is the night which truly understands her. When she is alone, when she can be herself, It is the time when she removes the mask she wears. She can literally feel the seconds in each minute pass by and even though she is beyond tired; her mind is racing with thoughts. Lying in bed, just like she was yesterday and the day before. Why does it hurt so much? This intangible feeling that has no rational backing, why does it hurts so much and all she wants to do is to somehow explain it in words. But she can’t. All she can do is waiting and hope that tomorrow is better. All she wants is to let it go, to the pain go, to feel alive for more time. She can't even properly recall a moment where she was at peace, where there was no pain. And as she stops crying and begins hiccups, alone and tired, she witnesses a shooting star. With hope in her heart she closes her eyes and prays; just come once to witness the love in her heart than the idea of return, she will leave it for you to decide. No matter where she goes, No matter she does, No matter how busy she gets, You won’t get off her mind, Whenever your name comes up, She gets into the same prison which she has been trying to escape. Why did you get away from her? Why! She won’t be healed from this pain. She won’t be cured not in this life but in the life after, Let these days be her witness, There will be a time when you will come but she won’t be waiting for you. What if we could reverse life and pause it . . . . . . .