A La Orden - Politically Correct Colombia

by Jamal Robinson (United Kingdom (Great Britain))

I didn't expect to find Colombia

Colombia is nowhere near as politically correct as England and sometimes it puts me in an uncomfortable position. I was getting my haircut when an overweight man came in, selling bottled water and soft drinks. No one wanted anything and so he left, but twenty seconds later, my barber walked to the door and shouted "Gordo" (the word for "fat" in spanish). The salesman returned and sold him a bottle of water. I was sat, stunned, with half a head of hair thinking "if that was me I’d have kicked off". Nobody else batted an eyelid. It turns out it's quite common and fairly sociably acceptable to refer to someone who's overweight as "fat" in Spanish - or Colombia at least. On the other hand, there are aspects of Colombian society that seem much more politically correct than England. An example being; there is absolutely no problem with breastfeeding in public (fat or thin). It's seen as it should be; a woman simply feeding her child. I see no problem with public breastfeeding (there's a "but" coming). It's a beautiful thing, but the other day a young lady made me re-evaluate my views on the matter. The first thing that I tasted in Villavicencio was an empanada and I've never looked back. I remember the day fondly. I landed at Vanguardia Airport Villavicencio - the tiniest of airports. I was greeted by two members of the University. I nervously approached the car without knowing if they spoke much English but to my luck (and their hard work) they did and, best of all, one of the first questions they asked was "are you hungry?". Shortly after, we pulled up to a small shop and that's when I discovered one of Colombia's national treasures: the Empanada. Empanadas are to Colombia, what pasties are to England or patties to Jamaica: delicious, savoury stuffed pastry. (Back on topic) Fast-forward a couple of months, and I've found my local empanada shop. I probably see the server two to five times a week and every time I see her I'm greeted with a warm smile and the words "A la orden" which is roughly translated into "at your service." Tonight was different though. She looked me in the eyes, the smile was still there and she told me the names of all the salsas again but, she was serving two. The woman was breastfeeding while serving me and this thrusted me into one of those not so comfortable positions I'd been in. I mean, imagine rolling up at a McDonalds drive-through and the woman passing you your chicken legend meal had a little one sucking on her nipple... you'd have something to say. I'm all for equality and no woman should be made to sit in a bathroom and feed her child but equally, I don’t think I should be getting my meal at the same time as the little Juan. In all fairness, it was an exemplary display of multitasking. With the small child sucking on her teat; she took the empanadas out of the fryer, put them into a brown paper bag, managed to fill a tub of guacamole and sorted out the change. Props to her but a la orden of your child before me por favor.