At ease in the peaks of the French Alps

by Katerina Erbesova (France)

I didn't expect to find Switzerland

I remember that day as it was yesterday. Friday 10th of February 2017. I was driving towards the new beginning when my eyes met the most incredible view. The highway was situated just perfectly around the Geneve lake surrounded by the French Alps. It was stunning! My heart was beating so fast. I was excited and stressed and anxious and happy. There was so much to this moment. I finally arrived to my destination. A day which has forever changed my life. Home stopped feeling that way and so I took my car and left to look elsewhere. I always dreamt of knowing the sexy French language well. So here I was. Full car and one little soul in the suburb of Lausanne. It was the cleaning lady who showed me around. The kindest person I have ever met. The house was huge. Everything I could ever dream of. A swimming pool, a home made cinema, a room full of all genres of movies, huge kitchen with the magical view. Not even enough time to unpack my suitcase and we were already leaving. Direction Megeve, France. The place to be. We arrived and I was briefly introduced to the whole family. A few minutes after the parents were already leaving me alone with the boys. I got two boys. Two small angels. The beginning was very shy. I was not at ease with my French and did not know their routine so each day I was learning. However I am fast learner and I got comfortable quite soon. Although I never had a younger sibling or any experience with the kids, I remembered what my mum used to do and that is how I treated them. I always treated like they were mine. My boys. And at the beginning it all felt so fresh, great and easy. But life is not easy. I started to realise how much of myself I am putting into this, that basically I become a parent, a someone who is there at any time to listen, to hug, to play. Leaving them even for a weekend was my craziest dream and the biggest fear. I felt lost and yet I had to be there for those two who craved the attention of their parents that was never given to them. At the same time, I felt really alone. It was hard to find friends. I found a few. I was lucky. But friends come and go and I was left alone again. The growing need of the family, especially the dad was extreme. He always came with an impossible task and I had no other choice than find a way. Make it happen. That was the only thing that mattered. In the world of rich people, there is no. I came to Switzerland as an ambitious woman aiming to go far in life, to find a well payed job, a perfect house, a fast car however I was not this person anymore and it only took few months. I started go hiking. This is what all the Swiss do, besides eating tons of cheese. Many different trails and magnificent views, thousands of hours, numerous questions in my head, many glorious peaks, hundreds of pictures and one pair of shoes. I could sit up there for hours, thinking of life, of myself, of who I want to be, of life. All this time I had for myself together with this crazy experience have completely changed me. We are nature. There was nowhere else to be. I fought for myself and for the kids. I changed the view of my future with only one goal - to be happy, no matter who you got. I have learnt to be with myself. I started to reconnect with my soul and with the nature and I never felt more content and at peace. Appreciate each experience even when it is not easy. It gives you so much more in exchange.