CONFRONTING MY THALASSOPHOBIA FEARS

by Daniela Holcombe (Mexico)

A leap into the unknown Mexico

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The ocean terrifies me, but I like to push myself to get out of my comfort zone, so last year my brother and I traveled to Mazunte to celebrate his birthday. We booked a tour which included whale and dolphin sightings and snorkeling. We were literally in the middle of the ocean and I was trying not to freak out when we spotted two giant whales, and I captured them on video, ¡it was the most magical thing I’ve ever seen! That’s when my fear went away, I was just so happy and enjoying the moment, later on we saw dolphins and they were following our boat. Then, there came the part where we had to do snorkeling, and I was like ‘’okay, let’s do it'’ so I jumped after much hesitation, and when I hit the water my life vest did something weird and I started panicking, I felt like a shark was coming out of nowhere to kill me, but everyone was so calm that I didn’t want to cause a scene. They gave me some goggles, but I was terrified to look under water, I spent like a minute in the ocean and then I had a rush to get back on the boat to feel safe again. So I climbed the stairs on the side of the boat but the life vest was heavy so it pulled me backwards and I fell back into the ocean and I freaked out. I climbed the stairs again using all the strenght in my arms to hang to the boat in order for me not to fall again, so I leaned forward to the boat and I cut my leg, I started bleeding, HARD. There was a lot of blood coming out of my leg so my first instinct was to put some water in the wound, so I slipped my hand into the ocean to grab some water and apply it to the wound, and it burned so bad, I repeated the process and then my mind went ‘’¡Oh my God! now a shark it’s actually going to kill me'’ and I panicked even more. Later that night, we also went to a lagoon that has bioluminiscence, and I was genuinely ¡so excited! We drove for like three hours to get there, and we jumped into a little boat and it took us like fifteen or maybe thirty minutes to get to the point where the bioluminiscense it’s the strongest, there was another boat and the guys that were driving it exchanged some words about crocodiles, and I was like ‘’¡WHAT?!'’ so I paid attention to their conversation and I heard ‘’I didn’t see them'’ So I asked our tour guy ‘’is there crocodiles on this lagoon?'’ and he was silent for three seconds and then replied ‘’No...'’ which obviously meant ¡yes! Anyway, I jumped into the water fully aware that there were crocodiles and I kept repeating to myself ‘’you’re fine, don’t worry, nothing bad it’s going to happen'’ besides, I felt like a mermaid, those lights are pretty cool and we were all having a lot of fun. There were a lot of tiny fish on the lagoon that you could feel them touching you and that would just trigger me to think it was a crocodile, so there I was thinking ‘’oh well, I wasn’t eaten by a shark this morning, but I am definetely going to be killed by a crocodile tonight'’. And guess what? Luckily I wasn’t. Oh, and the next day we woke up with our faces swollen.