“Gopu...I’m afraid...”

by Namrtha Ponnath (India)

A leap into the unknown Indonesia

“Once you board the plane, you are on your own. Remember you cannot run to your Mama and Papa asking for help”my father said while handing over my bag pack. After ingesting a loads of advice I bid farewell to him. I sat on my seat and and my neighbor helped me buckle my belt. Well , it was my first time on flight.The engine started to roar and it’s sound brought out the indecisiveness hidden in my mind. I was unsure if my decision to become the first lone woman international traveller from my family was right or not. I was not afraid but was anxious of uncertainty that lied before me. The flight had taken off and I realised that I had no way back. I took a peek at my watch it was already 1:05 in the morning so I closed my eyes and dozed off. I woke up in 2-3 hours and witnessed the most beautiful dawn of my life and I remembered how it was strenuous struggle of past three months that I took to persuaded my father to let me attend Asian World Model United Nations at Bali and I knew that this is the start of new leaf in my life. St the end I reached Bali , an island surrounded by Sapphire like blue water glowing under sunlight and that’s when I realised ‘Bali is Beautiful...’. We got off the plane and after completing the formalities we came out of airport. We boarded the bus and went to hotel. On the way to hotel I saw some familiar faces at the unfamiliar place, they were the sculptures of Pandavas of Mahabharata and Jatayu of Ramayana which made me feel secured, don’t know for what reason.Well, historically India and Bali does have a close relationship. We reached our 4 star hotel and I had to stand in scorching heat for two whole hours to check in.I almost cursed the person who posted that November is a rainy season in Bali. At night after unpacking and having our food, my roommate took me out to beach along with her friends. I was meeting her friends for first time, we were four girls and three boys. We reached the beach at 2 in the morning, it was pitch dark. The fishing boats were taking a nap on shore and the cold breeze was blowing on my face. What happened next was something that bought a shiver to my nerve. My colleagues out of blue started to drink and smoke in there. You ask what’s the matter in that. You might probably think it’s not an uncommon thing. But being from a conservative South Indian family, where parents taught that all those who drink and smoke cannot be trusted and that they might cause harm to you, is enough to frighten the innocent children of my family. To tell the truth I had never seen a person smoke and drink in front of my eyes. I was frightened to my wit’s end . The anxiety and fear started to build inside me like a volcano that is going to explode. I took out my phone and called my bestie. She picked up the phone. Before she could say hello, I spurted out, “Gopu, I’m afraid...” I was in a situation from where I can neither run away nor stay comfortably. After a few minutes of conversation I felt a bit relieved. I put my phone in my pocket and returned to them. Now I started put my cards in, I started to use my intuition and logic. I talked to each one of them and heard their life story. With that I segregated them according to their character, In my mind I listed out those whom I have to be careful with. It did help me a lot for the rest of the days and from then on I was able to take control of my situations. There I realised that trust can never be built by judging ones habit. With the trust and faith I had in them and in my own decisions I came back to my hotel safe and sound ready to sleep cause tomorrow is another big day...