Notes Behind the Photo

by Raida A (Malaysia)

I didn't expect to find Indonesia

“Fasten your seatbelt, ensure your seat and table in an upright position also ensure your window shades are fully open as we will be landing shortly.” Announcement from cabin crew waken me up from delusional fantasy things about Indonesia. My seating just beside the window, I could feel this airplane start moving downward slowly and start hitting between marshmallow clouds. From 20 thousand feet above sea level, a crowded city of Yogyakarta becomes my current view at the moment and the oldest Hindu temple in Indonesia, Prambanan Temple also clearly seen from here. I read a lot about Indonesia. How big population in Indonesia, so many local languages in Indonesia, and heaven foods in Indonesia. Nevertheless, back to my intention why I come to Yogyakarta, Indonesia. My mum was born in Indonesia, married and stayed in Malaysia. But never come back after I was born, 26 years ago. I really want to know my real grandmother, grandfather, granduncle and whatever type of grand it is. Because my mum loves to talk about her family but I never meet all of them even once in my life. Last month, I steal one envelope which had addressed to my mum. It was from my grandmother and the letter date was 25 years ago. The address behind the envelope was leading me for this solo trip. Upon landing, I grab a taxi to the Tugu train station and headed to the Kebumen train station. I managed to buy Nasi Gudeg before depart as aromatic of coconut milk rice succeed to seduce my appetite. On the train, my eyes keep on staring at folded envelop. Based on my mum's story, my grandmother was a teacher and she had Netherland’s blood as well. Inside that envelop, there are one letter and one 4R size picture but has been ripped by using hand. Only half of the picture is safe and my father was in that photo. I don’t have any clue why only my father inside the photo. Where is another half of that photo? After arrived at the Kebumen train station, I ask one of the trishaw men to send me to the address stated behind the envelope and he agreed. After passing through several small villages, I already in front of the old single-story house and my feeling tell me that no one inside. I knock the door, but as expected - no one answer. Coincidently, an unknown skinny old man passed in front of the house and asking me, if I need his help. After explained everything, he is actually one of my granduncles. He tells me that no one stayed in this house since my grandmother passed away, 20 years ago. He convinced me to stay in this house but I refused politely as I already booked a hotel room nearby this area. Besides, I just want to have some visit, not to stay here. He respects my decision and he let me to enter this house. Most of the furniture covered with white fabric to prevent dust. I walk around the house from the garden, kitchen, main hall until I am entering the master bedroom. One of the boxes at the top of the cupboard does really catch my eyes. I open up that box. I found a lot of letters and written my mum’s name in the sender section. The only thing that caught my eyes was a piece of the old photo but was ripped and folded between the letters. Weird. Seems familiar with the photo. I try to match with the half-ripped photo which I bring along to Indonesia. It is matched! And, I noticed there are notes behind the photo and written in the Dutch language “Ik wil je zien zelfs een keer voordat ik mijn ogen dicht” or with English translation “I want to see you even once before I close my eyes”. You know what, inside another half-ripped photo, it was me with my mum when celebrating my 1st birthday in Malaysia. It was 25 years ago. I take a deep breath and make a call to my mum in Malaysia. I tell about the photo, and she cried.