Nothing but a detour

by Carlo Ebrada (Indonesia)

A leap into the unknown Sweden

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I remember chasing flying airplanes on a bright blue sky in a small town in the outskirts of Sorsogon in the Philippines. I would shout, wave my hand, and run until the airplane becomes out of my sight. It was pure bliss as a kid to see an airplane, which was a rare yet magnificent sight. The sound that it made was music to my ears. Back then, life was difficult and seeing something strange like flying airplanes made me wonder and dream. I would draw airplanes and imagine the places I could go. But everything was far-fetched and seemed really impossible. I became tired of chasing airplanes. The momentary joy it would give started to become a source of disappointment. I became resigned to the thought that I would never be up in the sky someday. It then came to a point that I have dismissed the very idea of riding an airplane; that it's only meant for the elite and the lucky ones. Years passed and things have taken major twists and turns in my life. I became an Overseas Filipino Worker in Doha, Qatar. I was full of vigor and I have planned so many things for my family. Unfortunately, something happened that I was not lucky enough to continue working overseas. With a heavy heart and unfulfilled dreams, I went back home and felt like a loser. I didn't know how to start over again. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to recollect my self and move forward from such unpleasant experience. It took me several weeks to recover and rationalise things. I went back home to the Philippines to reassess my life. I had to pause and reflect on the major steps I have planned to take on for my career. But unlike when I was a little child when I would get too excited whenever I would see airplanes flying over my town's sky, the feeling now became so disturbing and unfamiliar. I wouldn't even look up and hearing airplane sounds feels like they're a hovering unpleasant reminder of a painful experience in Doha. Indeed, the way the universe works is something so difficult to fathom. My sister had to get married to her long time boyfriend from Gothenborg, Sweden. Since I was the only family member who has a passport and has the chance to get a Schengen visa to be present at my sister's wedding, I decided to work on the requirements. Long story short, I got approved and was blessed enough to travel thousands of miles away from home. With that trip to Sweden, I was able to gain back my self-esteem and the vigor I used to have about travelling and working for my family. Being in a place like Sweden that never in my wildest dreams I could reach, is something liberating and at the same time revolutionary. I freed myself from the chains of regrets and pain. It has given a me a paradigm shift in my personal and professional life. Sometimes, life leads as to a lot of detours and diversions. But this same detour would make us realize that, indeed, there is joy and enigma in the unknown and unexpected. Sweden healed me...its people, its beautiful sceneries, and its way of doing things brought me back to my core. I did not only attend my sister's wedding but my trip to Sweden allowed me to once again look up the sky, chase airplanes, and ultimately, dream and wonder.