Pushing through the limits on the Camino

by Nikoleta Michalova (Spain)

A leap into the unknown Spain

“What was I thinking? What the hell was I thinking?” Those were the only thoughts running through my head as I was almost running through the breath-taking pine forest, whose beauty I did not get to appreciate. All I knew was that I did not meet a soul in the past half an hour. There was no road near-by. Just one man walking behind me. Perhaps, I was being unreasonable. He could’ve been just another hiker. Or a local. I was hungry, walking for the past 2 hours without a break, sick, and had a hurt foot, and my thinking abilities were greatly reduced. Maybe I was just hallucinating! Why do I automatically assume that everybody wants the worst for me? “Ay, what was I thinking?” Close to giving up, I finally saw the forest opening up to a vineyard in front of me and heard the first sounds of a group of teenagers messing around loudly. Their disruption of the peace came to me as a wave of relief, and I started to feel my body relax. My breathing returned to normal and as adrenaline went from my body, I started coughing once again and my nose seemed to have accumulated lots of dirt and mucus in the past half an hour. The heaviness of the bag was overwhelming, reminding me of just how tired I got. Blood in my foot was pulsating, reminding me that I should not be walking, but sitting and putting ice on that bee bite to reduce the swelling. I needed a break. That’s when I noticed it. Part of the vineyard was, in fact, a terrace with people sitting under wine and something else. Kiwi? Is it possible that kiwi grows here? How fascinating! Later I was to find out that kiwi was introduced to Spain in the 20th century from China. It’s a fruit that needs a lot of sun and therefore it was surprising to find it in the relatively rainy region of Galicia – Andalucia seems more suitable for a plant like that. I ordered a cup of green tea with honey and Tarta de Santiago and took a seat. I took a sip and felt the magic fluid warming me up from the inside. The warmth spread and relaxed my muscles further, this time giving them a real break and letting me regain energy. The sun was shining. Birds were singing. People in the background chatting. “What was I thinking?” The question came up in my head again, but this time it was not bitter. It was a moment of pure curiosity. “What was I hoping to get from this experience?” I had hoped to rediscover myself after so many changes in my life and to enter the new period fresh. I had been curious to understand the transformational nature of the Camino. There is also a small possibility, just a teeny-tiny one, that I had wanted to see how much my body could endure. It seems like not much. Finishing seems like an inhumane achievement. Not because it’s hard, just because I am so weak. How did I get to this point? It’s the skipped days at the gym, the extra cake after lunch, and the evening wine. I need to quit that wine. Living in Spain without wine. What an irony! People drink wine like water here, it’s cheap, it’s everywhere, and it’s good quality. Gosh, you even get a whole bottle of wine with your daily menus (in all but touristy restaurants, of course). Wine is my evening creativity companion, my drink of choice when with friends, my go-to when I don’t know what to drink with lunch. Giving it up? It seems like giving up a friend that I get to see only once a while, but with whom I always spend quality time. Wine is life. In vino veritas. Letting the thoughts disappear among the singing birds, I put up my face to the sun to caress me and take care of me. It did not matter whether I could finish this route. If not today, next time. I have all the time in the world.