The Rich Port

by Dima Tuzov (Russia)

I didn't expect to find Puerto Rico

Regardless of any virus, we have traveled a lot. On Caribbean cruises I jack-daniel's every day, enough to protect both of us. I didn't expect to find that the only decent Caribbean destination we have seen was Puerto Rico. After seeing the island in and out I realized that this piece of rock had digested tons of money for a couple of centuries (and just several years later effectively defaulted on its debt, which means its government did their best to make people happy). I didn't expect to find that after dropping anchor 3 times there we would like to do it again! It's a 'must-see', really a 'rich port', culturally. Apart from a terrific fortress, nice streets and burrito, I could excavate some Spanish out of me (which I used only once - when girls from Venezuela pretended they were Italians). I didn't expect to find that an ordinary parcel sent by US Mail would reach Texas within a week. We bought some nice stuff including a calendar with Chuck Norris quotes to bet that it would never reach my friend there. Why did not they lose it - only God knows. I didn't expect to find that I could buy rum at a pharmacy - a US chain, CVC. Shocked by seeing suitcases for sale in a NYC pharmacy, I thought that was enough for retail 'convergency'. No! Needless to say, a DRUGstore will soon match its banner, given the legalization of you know what. I hope Puerto Rico government will not legalize 'pot' - otherwise the whole place will turn into a dump. Instead one should take a great - a 2-feet cup - long island iced tea served at a place on the quay with a big toad overseeing it - and say goodbye to PR. Soy un hombre muy horrado. A ya ya yai.