The Story of Finding Myself

by Selen Aktümen (Turkey)

Making a local connection Turkey

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I quit the job 3 weeks ago. I suddenly found myself in Ankara. I was wondering why I want to visit this place and why it attracted me here. The part of Ankara where I was born and that my family never knew was here. Maybe a half I don't know myself. I became integrated in a few days. I recognized myself and what I was. Not only that, but how I look like relatives. Which of my features, stance and production. However, I came back from Ankara. But still part of me was still there. When I returned to Istanbul, there was a big gap. I went again to unravel the secret of why. I was there again last week. This time I traveled and saw the whole city. From the biggest historical monuments to the most beautiful dining places. I lived the city. I played memories of my childhood. I integrated with my memories and found my own self. I went to the top and looked at the city. I said everyone has a struggle for life. While everyone was dying to escape from this city, I dreamed of moving to this city. The nickname of Ankara is the city of civil servants. It is not as fun as Istanbul, it is not a city where life continues. Is that what's important? More people, a never-ending life. Continuously bright cities? No, it's important to feel yourself in a city. It's not how important the city is. It is important to love that city and find someone who can love it in that city. Not only that. This time, these experiences will not remain in my memories. I shot the video of all of them, photographed one by one. My friends, family and texture of every place I visit. I wrote the whole city. I wrote my notebook what I felt in everywhere and what the city was trying to tell me. It's been a few days. Ankara with everything in mind. With its historical museums, eating places, stone streets, people, life and atmosphere. I'm back with my evidence with my videos, photos and notes. I made it like a museum. Like the Anatolian Civilizations Museum. I am like pictures, vases and stones from the Hittites with evidence from 2020 for the future.