The unlovable French cliché

by Marco Tulio Duarte Conceição (Brazil)

I didn't expect to find France

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We got there around midnight, it was dark and colder than I ever been exposed to, like the bottom of an ocean, I imagine. Although not a single soul was there to scare us, she screamed so loud inside the car, still moving, that I thought the driver would take us to imminent death. The Parisian laughed and said that he never heard someone get to notes that high. I wanted to scream loud too, like her, or louder but I had no strength to do so. I was petrified. We went from Marseille to Paris because I wanted a break from work with my friends. Even if it was of one day. It wasn’t my first World Wonder, honestly, the Colosseum isn't that much as I expected. Still, as a lover of history, I enjoyed Rome a lot, the city is an “open sky museum” indeed, and what got my attention there was The Pantheon. So I was hoping just for a tower in Paris. When I came up with the idea to travel, my friends went crazy, mostly Dewi and Eugene we were very excited but it was needed four people to buy promotional tickets, so we asked Lenie, that I honestly couldn’t know how to unplug, she’s a talkative machine. Almost there, after long hours of work, unable to sleep on the train because of the infinite batterie of Lenie and observing the lovebirds almost like they were about to exchange vows. It was too much for me. But finally, we arrived. -Problem? Said a cute but rude French guy at the train station after my failed flirting. I guess the flirt was because of my tiredness, or dizziness after listening to Lenie's life history since the day she was born. She's 30. Dewi couldn’t hide her frantic state, Eugene just wanted to make her happy. It was annoying, but I couldn’t ruin their trip, so I decided to follow the course of the river, literally, following the Seine on our way from the Gare de Lyon to the Tower. We were there exactly one day before the Notre-Dame Cathedral fire. I, fortunately, saw it from the car window. -AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH! She screamed washing my mind. But the moment I got out of the car and saw the Eiffel Tower I felt something bigger than me, is it engineering? I don't know. Something colossal. A Terrifying beauty. I was in love but not with someone, something! And not even the screaming damsel was able to rescue me from that deafening silence! For a skeptical guy like me, that's not an easy thing to admit. And Lenie was silent too. After hours of anesthetic amusement, we realized we were alone except for lots of rats giving us the Ratatouille reminder that we should eat and hide from the cold. Surprisingly all the cafeterias were closed, it was difficult to find shelter so we improvised and used the Sanisettes in the streets. Public toilets are roomy and have warm hand dryers, and shelter for about twenty minutes before opening the door again. It was hard to go in and out until dawn. We strolled. It's surprising what you can do in one day, we went to the Hard Rock, Arc De Triomphe, and Museé du Louvre. Unfortunately, I couldn’t enter because of the endless row. Accordingly to a Parisian I met there, we need at least three weeks to see it all. Back again to the tower, I shivered once more, what I saw before was not the same. All those wires and lifts, it was alive. That row wouldn’t stop us. So, we climbed, I meant, three of us because Lenie didn’t want to, it seems like height can unplug her. It was so cold that even the couple stopped in the middle. But I had to conquer the giant, I kept going. The weather I was not used tried to make me give up, froze my eyelids and lips. It didn’t matter, for what I saw up there. The sunlight touched my face and even though it was unable to unfreeze it, my heart was burning of passion for Paris. I, the conqueror, was conquered. Paris, je t’aime!