The Waves

by Caterina Pallotta (Italy)

A leap into the unknown USA

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The waves are gently caressing the waterfront at La Jolla Shores Beach. It’s too early for sunset, but too late for the sun to make my skin tingle. The wind is soft through my hair, yet stiff against the palm trees standing high, unrivaled. Why do I keep coming here? I’ve been in San Diego long enough to know all the picturesque, off-the-beaten-path backroads that lead to the most stunning beaches. I could embark on the 40-minute drive to Sunset Cliffs, where land and sky merge into an unforgettable golden embrace to give the sweetest farewell to every day that passes. Or I could go lie down on the sand at Windansea Beach, the sheltered corner of paradise with the moss-covered rocks and a nostalgic atmosphere that remind me of my beloved Ireland. And by some fortuitous happenstance, the swiftest ride would happen to be the one to my place of the heart, the wondrous, sublime, and otherworldly Torrey Pines Gliderport. But still, I come here every time, as if my soul craves the unpretentious splendor of this place, the first scrap of ocean I saw after arriving in America’s Finest City. “What brought me here?” I wonder – the waves faintly reaching my ears, echoing my heart’s sighs. No one wanted me to leave Italy, yet no one really wanted me to stay. But this time I couldn’t. I couldn’t keep on doing as I was told to, shutting my emotions and putting aside my dreams. I craved adventure, wilderness, and freedom. I longed for the road, for nights spent lighting fires by the ocean, and I needed the emerald forests, the boundless valleys, the labyrinthine cities, the lonely desert… I could feel it rushing through my veins as if I was there in all those places, all at once. The only voice I had to listen to was my soul’s. The only choice I had was California. For the first time in my life, I stopped dwelling on things and I started taking action. I quit hiding behind my fears and I started defying them. But most importantly, I put an end to my quest for happiness and I started to create my own. And believe me, once you face your greatest fears and you realize there was actually no reason to be scared, nothing can stop you anymore. From that exact moment on, you’re bound to the road forever. No hailstorm, no snowfall, no bushfire will keep you from continuing on the path you were destined for. The unknown is all you will ever know. “Do you. Be you. Carve deep into your heart, and you will know your truth” said Laine, with the most beautiful smile I’ve ever seen, while whale watching on a windy Sunday morning a few weeks ago. Laine, one of the God-sent angels I’ve met during this incredible journey, along with Kevin, the most inspiring teacher I’ve had in my whole life, Rina, the funniest carpool karaoke partner, Satoko, whose hands can capture the best photographs… Now more than ever, I believe everyone I meet on the road is right there by some divine design. It’s never by mere, meaningless chance. I’ve spent my whole life being thrown here and there by the violent waves surrounding me, never able to reach the shore and catch my breath. I’ve always felt like a bottle carrying a message, shifting through the sea. A message so important to share, but so hard to find someone to give it to. Will I ever reach the shore and accomplish what I was born to do? Will there be a day when someone will pick me up, saving me from my endless drifting and finally reading my words? I believe every journey is relentlessly unpredictable like the sea, so I will keep going, I will keep discovering, and I will keep searching for the answers. Every new day and every new place is a white canvas to start it all over again, just like the water wipes the shore, wave after wave. They say California is a state of mind. I say California is a state of grace.