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Trust me I have never had this feeling. An incredible urge to retire at 40 and live a life not just for the sake of living. This fisherman's village nestled somewhere far from the maddening crowd gave me something which nothing the last 29 years of my life gave me. People lazing around on the beach, strolling the roads, going the extra mile to help you if you lose the way, strangers smiling back and greeting you for no apparent reason, drivers stopping their cars to let you pass even if you are the only person crossing the road... where do I stop? #sitges is as unreal as it gets. I stopped and sat on a bench by the sea pinching myself hard, this surely isn't a dream right? It is quite fascinating how our outlook towards things change when we turn old. When I was in my early twenties I was burning my midnight oil for a better career , more material things and money. Not that these things dont matter any more, but perhaps my perception of happiness and things around which the definition of being happy revolves has changed a lot. There is never one thing that will ever make you happy. Happiness can only be found in little things. As I stood by the clear blue waters of the Sitges beach, I could not help but wonder, that my affair with the sea started when I was 10. I would take a stroll by the humble Puri beach holding my grandfathers hands often wondering how could the water rise so high above the ground and retreat? I would sit with him in the evening until the lights went off, begging him not to take me back to the holiday home we were staying in, reasoning that even if there was no light the waves were still there and I loved the sound of the waves. So much has changed today. People who we love do not stay forever with us. Yet the sea... it remains. It will be there when you and I die. When the differences we created wears off, when everything else we fight and die for does not matter anymore. "How would you like to die?", someone once asked me. "When I feel there is nothing to live for, no one to love, no ambitions to fulfil, no purpose to my existence, I want to walk straight into the sea. Like having a chat with death and taking pride in the way I die, in the arms of my first love , beautiful, undying and yet unforgiving.