unforeseen circumstances of my first trip

by Taiana Farias (Brazil)

Making a local connection Brazil

On October 24, 2019 i traveled alone by bus, for the first time, outside my state: Bahia. I would leave the northeastern region of Brazil towards São Paulo, the largest city in the country. The plan was to arrive in the capital of São Paulo, meet friends and go to the countryside together. I was a little anxious, but very happy to do it myself, it was a BIG thing for me, as a woman alone, with anxiety and accelerated thinking syndrome !! my bus was scheduled to leave at 4 am on 24, but contrary to my schedule, the bus was very late and only arrived at 8 am when it found out that the bus company had sold me tickets with departure at the time that no longer existed, I was already quite apprehensive because I knew that this delay would impact my plans, the bus came from Rio Grande do Norte and was already quite full, my seat was marked next to a man, which made me feeling a little apprehensive, being a woman alone, I was anxious, it was important to be on the side of someone who did not cause me discomfort, especially because I would spend the night on that bus. luckily for me, that was a nice and respectful guy we talked a lot which helped to spend time, 27 hours on the road. the bus made many stops and usually took more than 40 minutes, now I knew I couldn't get there on time, and I cried when my friends sent a message saying that they couldn't wait for me anymore, it was already 6:30 pm on the 25th and my bus would arrive only at 00 on the 26th! my friends took the bus inland and I stayed !! a little desperate. I arrived in São Paulo and had to spend the night at Tietê station! which was really scary! the next day, scared to death, i had to get a subway and go to the barra funda station, i never felt so small in my life! so many different faces, so many people !! but my heart was happy, I was proud of myself and at that moment it felt like nothing could stop me. while I went through those crowded stations my head was already making several travel plans alone, I knew now that I only needed confidence in myself, it seemed that the world was more accessible! When I arrived at Barra Funda Station, I discovered that the bus to my destination in the countryside would only leave at 6:30 pm. Well, it was still 6:15 am, and once again I realized that I would have to wait all day inside a bus terminal to be able to continue my journey! I thought: "I can enjoy these hours and go out and explore the city" and immediately that whole wave of confidence passed and gave way to my old and paralyzing friend: fear! I gave myself a break, took a deep breath, and sort of unintentionally, I started walking towards one of the subway station maps that is spread out over the station walls! I must have spent about 20 minutes or more standing there in front of that map, trying to understand it and drawing the best route, I wanted to visit so many places in Sao Paulo, but I only had a few hours so I would have to choose the most important places to go and come back in time to get my bus, I decided to go on Avenida Paulista, São Paulo market and on March 25 avenue, the whole trip would be made by subway, basically it would be simple, and it was already resolved: I would! but for some reason i was standing there crying, not knowing why! today I think that was a cry of happiness, So there I was walking towards my little adventure in São Paulo, determined not to regret not doing something! I went and it was... enriching, i need more lines to be able to tell this story of travel inside the trip,lived in 12 hours what i haven´t lived in 29 years! that's how I want to live! traveling.